Walking on Water

To honor Him fully we have to live in such a way that unless God shows up, what we are attempting to do is bound to fail.- Bill Johnson, Hosting the Presence.

When Jesus commissioned His disciples He told them to go; to go even without provisions in the natural such as a place to stay, money, or clothing.
"After this the Lord appointed seventy-two others and sent them two by two ahead of him to every town and place where he was about to go. 2 He told them, “The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field. 3 Go! I am sending you out like lambs among wolves. 4 Do not take a purse or bag or sandals; and do not greet anyone on the road.-Luke 10:1-4"

He told them to make themselves so vulnerable to His purposes that if He didn't come through they would not succeed. This is what I learned to do over the past 6 months. When I packed my bags in May and decided to go on a faith journey with God, not knowing what it may require, I surrendered all to Him with no plan B. I put all dreams, friends, comforts, safety, provisions, and finances into Jesus's hands and told him. "If you do not come through, if you do not show up, I will fail in all aspects. I will not and can not go on without you." After agreeing to His plan and burning all bridges there was no chance of going back to life as normal. I gave it all to Him, until I had nothing left other than trust and reliance on His beautiful nature. So I went; on a journey of walking by faith and not by sight. And oh did He come through; abundantly, unexpectedly, and extravagantly! The journey led me first to Mozambique where He sent people from around the world to teach me how it looked to live a life completely yielded and dependent on His Spirit. Then he took me to some of the darkest and most perverse places in the world. Thailand, Cambodia, and Vietnam, to live out the reality of what I had been taught in the months before. He began stretching my love and trust in Him at such exponential rates my growth was unbeknownst to me at times. He also taught me that sometimes the safest place is in the front lines of the battle; because where there is darkness, the light shines the brightest. "For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ." -2 Corinthians 4:6

So naturally after learning and living this type of lifestyle for 5 months I expected it to continue once I came back to the United States. If He was inviting me back home I fully expected Him to continue providing and surprising me. All the while making me more dependent on Him and entrenched in this Spirit led lifestyle. After all, it was what I had surrendered to, agreed to, and was what I had been taught was the only way to live. So imagine my surprise when I arrived back in America and they didn't like this supernaturally dependent lifestyle. They regarded it as weak, as foolish, as unwise. But it's all I knew, all I could remember. Another way of life seemed hazy now, a memory at best; so I continued through. As I arrived back I had no plans, just open to whatever He wanted. And what He wanted was for me to have a season of rest. Something very foreign to many Americans, and even to me. Rest was something not highly regarded as a high priority or valuable by the culture here. But despite all the voices beckoning me to get realistic, to get practical, to get serious. I stayed firmly planted and rooted in what God had shown me, to rest. I'm sure rest looks very different for many people but for me it looked like spending every day in His presence; singing, worshiping, and talking to Him. Devoting my whole day to what He had to say, not being distracted by money, people, or success. And I'm so thankful for every moment of it, what a blessing it's been to have this time with Him. Sure there have been days where I would begin to question is this really what God said to do? What am I doing with my life!? Why am I here? But I stayed put, not moving to the right or the left, just resting in His promises. I've learned once again that even in America, in a place where everyone might think you have to earn or work for what you want, He always provides freely, always protects, always satisfies, and always lavishes the best gifts on us. This journey back has been quite different than I expected, but nevertheless treasured in my eyes. I think I'll look back on this time for many months to come and smile at the deep heart work He did and preparations He made in this month. I know this season of rest is soon coming to a close and that He has something else for me in this faith journey. But rest assured whatever comes I'll still continue dependent as ever, leaning on childlike faith, and smiling and laughing all the way. And I believe if I listen close enough I can hear Him saying over me... ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; so now I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!-Matthew 25: 21’