The Unfailing Love of the Knight

Today as I was praying, I asked God to show me what He wanted ministry to look like. My scattered thoughts began to form questions like; What did He want me to start? Who did He want me to talk to? Where did He want me to go? Gently and patiently He began to silence my demanding questions by a simple beautiful illustration.
First, I saw a belt that had the word "Truth" engraved on the buckle of it. I then proceeded to look up and see a helmet, sword, and complete suit of armor. There was even a cape attached that changed from hues of red to white. At first, I wasn't sure if this was me suited up for battle or Jesus, but it soon became very clear as I saw the Knight with the white cape on a journey to rescue a princess in a tower. The Knight slayed the dragons that were blocking the way to the princess with such ease and effortlessness, that there really was no competition. As He began to approach the castle that the princess was locked in, all around stood miniature people. They weren't miniature to the princess, but only to the Knight himself. The princess herself, was also very tiny compared to Knight. The people at the foot of the castle were taunting and jeering at her, and she was afraid to move, paralyzed by the fear of them. The Knight then came and rescued the princess from her castle she was frozen in. He walked with ease up to the castle entrance. Even when the people tried to stop Him their attempts were seen as a joke. Their little stones and torches did nothing to His solid armor and He barely even noticed them as He went to save His princess. He gently picked her up and put her on His shoulder. She then radically transformed and her dress turned into the same armor that was worn by the Knight, her armor was even complete with a cape only her's was pink. He then said to the tiny princess, "Just allow me to carry you though, just hold on to me. I will defeat your enemies for you, and I will show you and take you where you need to go. Just rest in me and my love."

After this I was praying to God was this from you or just in my head? And He told me to turn to John 5:32, which at the time I had no idea what it said. I turned to it and it said "But someone else is testifying about me and I assure everything He says about me is true." I then believed He meant the Holy Spirit was the one testifying about Him and this indeed was from God and not something I had just made up in my head. He then lead me to these verses. Romans 8:6 "But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to peace." And Romans 8:9 "You are controlled by the Spirit if you have the Spirit of God living in you."

This is how God answered my questions about ministry and how loving Him is supposed to look like. I believe it can apply to all of us, cause we are all God's children locked away in a tower like the princess. We all have been held captive by something, and we all are desperate for a Knight with a white cape to save us. He alone will carry you through the trials. He doesn't want you to do anything on your own but just allow Him to have you. Allow Him to fully love you. Allow Him to take you where He wants to go. While being in the Father's arms you are able to accomplish anything through Him because He's the one fighting the battle, and He always wins! Just allow Him to love you today, where ever you are, whatever you are going through. He wants you. This is what true ministry looks like, this is where Jesus's heart resides. Loving the Father and allowing yourself to be taken by Him to where He wants to go. This removes all pressure from you, because it's not about you. It's only by His power is anything accomplished. All He wants from us is love, and with love comes an abundance of trust. 
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight."-Proverbs 3:5-6


"Not to us, O Lord not to us, but to Your Name goes all the glory for your unfailing love and faithfulness ." Psalm 115:1

New Wineskin

As I sit here folding up my newly washed clothes, the ones that had been with me in Uganda, I can't help but feel angry at them. They stare back at me all clean, soft,  good smelling and perfect. Did they forget where they had been the past 2 months? How could they so easily go back into their American form? Didn't they remember they were the ones that gave a malnourished child comfort? The ones that Margret marveled over? Did they even remember their counterparts that I had given away to African women who gleamed when receiving them? Couldn't they still feel the red African dirt in between their threads?  No. They didn't remember, they couldn't feel. All they knew now was that they were washed clean and ready to fulfill their new purpose, which was to be worn in America.

How could they so easily change back and forget when I can not. As I was toiling over this truth, I realized some things. I had vowed to myself that I would not let myself forget the things I experienced this summer. I had so much determination in doing so that my experience had began to squeeze the life out of me. It had constricted me, paralyzed me, from doing what I am called to do in America. There is no doubt that I was changed this summer, but instead of applying these new found truths to my life in America, I decided to retreat instead. It was almost like I felt like a traitor if I did anything American. My heart didn't want to betray the people and things I learned in Uganda so instead of going into life full force, I decided to just be reserved, bitter, and sad about being back. Surely, if I just kept this animosity up towards America and withdrew from people it would show my loyalty to Uganda and to the changes that were made. However this is not true.

Just like the clothes that were hand washed for 2 months had to come back and be machine washed, so do I. They have a new purpose and so do I. Their purpose is to be worn in America, not Uganda. My new purpose is to be used by God in America, not Uganda. He does not want me disguard everything I learned, but to use what I learned to better serve and  love people in America. I don't need to hold on to my experiences, they will hold on to me, because now they are a part of me therefore they'll never leave. I don't need to be bitter about coming back, I should be joyful because God has ordained for me to be here. I could have been born anywhere in the world and He chose this place, this country, this town. It's not a coincidence that He has me here. He has something for me to do this year that no one else could accomplish. By sending me to Uganda He grew new gifts, characteristics, and talents in me that will further help me accomplish the goals and plans He has for me. If I am ever fortunate enough to get to go back to Uganda I would like to Thank her. Because through her beauty, love, and joy she allowed the creator of the universe to teach me truths that America never could. But now America has to teach me new truths that Uganda never could. And just maybe when the time is right me and Uganda will meet again...

He told them this parable: "No one tears a patch from a new garment and sews it on an old one. If he does, he will have torn the new garment, and the patch from the new will not match the old. And no one pours new wine into old wineskins. If he does, the new wine will burst the skins, the wine will run out and the wineskins will be ruined. No, new wine must be poured into new wineskins.- Luke 5:36-38